Lil Thoughts: September 2011

"Satisfaction"

I can't get no satisfaction

And I try, and I try, and I try, and I try

I can't get no, I can't get no satisfaction by: Britney Spears

For years I had done things with my talent that God has given me, all for the Praise of man. It was this feeling, this emotion, this addictive feeling that I craved after doing something and than hearing all the praise of man of how great I was. Now let me explain what I am talking about. This was anything from how funny I was in junior high, how skinny I could get so people would notice me, how great I played softball, how I wore unique clothes that no one would wear, how wild I wore my makeup, how wonderful I sang a song,how crazy and out there I would dance at pep rallys, even to making cakes for friends, writing letters in the mail, going out of my way to help someone, driving a hummer in high school, getting a huge senior ring, all these things I did, for one purpose, That purpose was not Christ centered and the purpose for all this is because inwardly I was lonely and outwardly I was screaming for attention and longing to be loved. I was using all this talent that God had given me, for Me! and only me! On the outside i might of seem like a great person but one thing that ppl could not see is the inside of my heart and how I felt after I would basically do anything, which was a feeling of great pride. Only I could feel that huge vest of pride that I had built over the years. It was a great feeling and at those moments I felt a high that maybe not even a crack addict had. See, what I was doing was all wrong, I had made myself believe I was a good person and Im sure I fooled others as well, but at the end of the day i couldnt fool God. I couldnt escape that I needed him. See Jesus didnt let pride get to his head, in John 6:1-15, is the story of the feeding of 5 thousand and with only 5 small loaves of bread and two small fish, everyone was fed, and there were leftovers as well. The people saw this, and said " surely this is the Prophet who is to come into the world. Jesus knew they wanted to make him king by force, so you know what he did?....He withdrew again to a mountain by himself. Meaning he got away from all the babble because he knew was he Christ, but he also knew that those people were wanting to crown him as king for what HE HAD DONE, and not just that they believed in him. So he had no part in that. So to explain what i mean by this is, for so many years I hadnt been withdrawing from the praise of man, but I had indulged in it, which lead to destruction and unfufillment in my life. Jesus is trying to teach us a lesson to be like him, which is not prideful and just taking time to get away and take it all in but in a humble manner. So that we dont get caught up in that ungodly mess. This is such a easy thing to do in life, whether we realize that were in that rally circle or not, so before getting stuck in that , run for the hills!!!! when you see Praise of man coming into your life, when you do something that people will praise you highly for,stay humble, because you can get stuck in this circle of trying to get praise of man and you forget the reason your able to do what you do, and that is your FAther, King of Kings! God Almighty!! Not because you practiced many hours or studied really hard but because God has given us all gifts, that we can not create on our own and he wants us to use these gifts for his glory and to add other people to his kingdom by what they see you do or see in you. They dont see you, but they see Christ living in you. Its amazing what God can teach you and help you overcome if you just stop doing it your way and do it his way and to learn his way is study and meditate on his word day and night so that he may open your eyes to the light that is right infront of you, but sometimes its so bright that is has blinded you, and you cant see God, all you see is whats best for you and how the world tells you to live and im telling you the worlds rule book will lead you on such a wide road and so many directions that you will become lost both spiritually and physically. It will lead to your death, you will be so dead that you will ask yourself where is life? I have tried so many things and nothing satisfies me, Exactly!! Because God can not provide life for you where it does not exist, but he will quench your thirst and he will satisfy your deepest desires in life, where nothing else can. God gives you water where you will thirst no more. You wont have to keep looking for new things, new places to go on the weekends, new car, new boyfriend/ gf, new club, but God will be your eternal resignation place, where you may rest. And I tell you all this because I have experience it, I was living for praise of man, I was full of pride, i was my own god. I worshipped myself of all the things I could do, but you know what??? It never satisfied me completely, I was always looking for ways to get Praise but someone or something always disappointed me they didnt thank me enough or I didnt feel like anybody notice If I had done something awesome. When you know where your heart is, is when you do things without anybody around, and its just you and God. thats where your true heart is. I would always ask myself there has got to be something more, and what that something more was, I needed God in my life fully. I needed to get that satisfaction that I had been desperately seeking to find but in all the wrong places but once I got into a place in my life, where I felt like I had nothing I cried out for God with a sincere heart and asked him to save me from this loneliness, that I had created myself. My very words in my journal were, I was empty. May I tell you that when God came into my life it was like a everlasting bottle of water ( my favorite drink) that never was empty, he filled my cup and I was satisfied and no longer thirst for this world, which is a cherry limeade, mountain dew, alcohol, energy drinks, the world allows you to suck on that straw and till there is no more and your trying to get that last sip of cherry limeade but you get to that lime and you cant suck it through your straw, and you have had enough, and your soul just wont let you go any farther, and thats when God uses a situation to draw you closer to him. When you have nothing left and this is just happened to me. And im here to tell you to throw that happy hour coke in the trash because it might sound like a good deal but it wont last in the long run, and it wont satisfy your deepest thirst and needs, which is a NEED of a Savior, to give you true life on this earth so that you may have eternal life.

3 Lessons to Take From this

1) He must become greater, I must become less. John 3:30 Means whatever your holding onto,let go of and let Christ be incontrol and dont miss out on all God has provided for you already and that satisfaction you have always desired! Dont let Pride control you like it did me!

2)Dont waste your life! "Why you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears or a little while and then vanishes. James 4:14- you dont know when you last day will be on this earth, God is in-control of that, you might think you have control but he does, so accept him before it is too late.

3)Choose Christ, drink out of Jesus well. Jesus tells us " Everyone who drinks this water ( talking about the worlds water) will be thirsty again ( you'll keep looking for more) but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them as spring of water welling up to eternal life John 4:13-14

A take home- meditate on this verse:

" God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble"

James 4:6

And now check you heart, desires, and motives in life?

Are you submitting to God? Resisting the devil? Is he fleeing from you? James 4:7

Or are you drowning in sorrow, and as Britney Spears says it:

Cant get no satisfaction

WHICH ARE YOU DRINKING FROM???